Embarassing Death Number One: Death By Goomba

Death by Goomba is just one of the most embarrassing things that can happen to a video game addict; far more embarrassing than the time my little sister's girlfriend was able to open a can I couldn't. Goombas aren't only slow and stupid; they don't seem to have any tools to take out everyone's favorite plumber. Take a look:

What's he going to do to take you out? He hasn't got any teeth (yet), and when he does get them, they seem pretty easy to avoid. He;s got no arms, so he can't punch you. He's got two tiny little feet that definitely can't reach out to kick Mario. So, how does this guy take you down?

But watch out, if he does get you, you're going to lose a life, or a power-up. More importantly, you will lose any respect you might have earned amongst your gaming friends. So, if one of these ugly little critters does take you out, hope that no one is there to see, and then deny, deny, deny (just like during a police interrogation). If you don't, you might lose all your respect amongst your friends, and never be able to show your face in public again.